Greenwoods Hotel Spa and Retreat, Essex

Was a member here for a year. Had to leave because of poor hygiene. Many members avoided jacuzzi. Changing room and showers absolutely stank. Management as useful as chocolate teapot. Don't be fooled by the great setting. As a member you will find out how awful it truly is

Price of treatments reduced by 20% after we’d booked, but they refused to refund the difference of £22.00. Also cost of Spa Day reduced by £6.00 each, so paid £34 more than people booking closerto the time! Lack or beds so had to sit outside as no available beds round pool or in relaxation rooms. Instead of fluffy white towels, there were tired looking blue and brown towels. Place looks worn and tatty in places.

Stayed for one night last week, booked in for 2 nights but checked out after one night. My husband and I were in Brentwood to visit relatives we checked in and then left to visit our relatives. On our return to the room that evening we noticed insects on the wall near the curtains, my husband killed several and then we rang reception. The receptionist said that she would send someone up and shortly afterwards a chap came with a Hoover and sucked up a further 12 approx. I must say that he was really helpful and tried to get us moved to another room but was told there was none available. We were up until 11.40 pm still hoovering up more insects as the chap left us the Hoover. I hardly slept that night and the next morning there were still insects on the wall so we decided to checkout of the room. My husband E Mailed the hotel using the contact name we were given by reception but unfortunately have had no response, would not ever return to this hotel. Clearly management of this hotel are not familiar with good customer service. PS do not know what the insects were but they could fly, and were also on the bed.

Had an absolutely awful experience - one problem after another - would certainly NOT recommend!

5+ years ago, I used to visit Greenwoods once a year and loved it. After some time away, I finally revisited with my mum on Friday 18th September for an overnight break. We has also contacted the hotel to book two treatments each and pay extra to arrive early to use the spa in the morning and have lunch. We spent over £300 - what a complete waste of money. We're gutted.

In a nutshell (though I could easily write an essay!):

- Hot Stones Therapy massage is NOT as described. I've had three hot stones massages at other places and every time, stones are placed on your body (palms of hands, feet, base of back etc) while you're being massaged. This is also how it's described on their website. But when it comes to it, both my mum and I were just massaged with the stones, they were never placed anywhere, so what was the point. She also left the towel off my leg when she moved to the other etc so I got cold. The massage was also like a deep tissue massage and my back physically hurt for 4 days afterwards and felt bruised. However, this is completely my fault as I did not say anything at the time (suffer from anxiety so confrontation is hard - my problem not theirs though in fairness)

- Two treatment rooms are right next to the waiting room. For my 70min facial, the first half of it was spent listening to a group of women (could have easily been hyenas or screaming banshees) and no one ever asked them to be quiet. Certainly NOT relaxing

- From 3pm onwards, the spa was completely full of above mentioned women/hyenas. There were no loungers available, no space in the jacuzzi, or space in the sauna on the three seperate times I checked between 3pm and 8pm. Lucky we had a room to go back to! When I did decide to just leave my things and go for a swim, I was out again in 5 mins as the noise was unbearable. I wanted to relax, not feel like I was in a busy pub.

- Relaxtion room is relaxing if you have your ipod on loud. Otherwise, it's just lots of slamming doors which wake you up and make you jump every time you drift off

- TV reception was awful so we couldnt watch anything. Chose not to complain about this as we'd ordered room service and didnt want someone fixing it while we were eating

- At 1am, the hyenas returned from the bar very drunk and rowdy in the hallway outside our room. Unlucky for us, they were staying next door and decided to carry on the party. By 2am, we complained to reception. The noise reduced for 10mins then continued. By 3am, I was banging on the wall and went for a walk. I ended up getting 1 hours sleep.

- On checking out, she asked if we'd enjoyed our stay. in the politest way, we explained the issues and handed over our feedback forms (which included our contact details). We received no apology and the receptionist just did not care.

- Their customer service is APPALLING! We never heard back from our feedback forms (when all we wanted was an apology). So I sent an email of complaint. I chased twice and only got a response after leaving bad reviews. They offered an overnight stay worth about £110. We spent over £600 in total! When I asked for a treatment as well or just a partial refund, they said it wouldn't be in their interest to do that so no. Theyve also lied in their response to my trip advisor review. Absolutely disgusting. Have reported them to trading standards.

We decided to have an intimate Wedding at Greenwoods, catering for a small number of people for a 4.30 wedding, an a la carte meal and then tea and coffee. We had the library and boardroom for hire.

Throughout the process our wedding coordinator Amy Crust was fantastic, she went out of her way to make sure we had things exactly as we wanted them. She was relaible, professional and always available when you needed to speak with her.

On the day she was waiting at the entrance for me to arrive which was very reassuring, and was making sure everything went according to plan, she was just there in the background if you needed to ask anything. The staff there were polite and helpful. The food was fabulous too!

We loved the honeymoon suite and it was of a good standard.

When I started looking at Wedding venues I didnt for a minute think I would end up at Greenwoods as I had heard bad things about it. Dont listen to other peoples negatives until you visit a place for yoursaelf. I couldnt rate them highly enough and am very grateful for all they did to make our day really perfect.

Thank you,

Alison & Paul

I attended Greenwoods spa for the first time ever through last minute with a friend who has been several times before and has rated the place quite highly, however this trip has ensured she doesn't go back again and me in particular!

After arriving, we weren't allowed to use the spa facilities until 2pm at check in so an expensive 2hrs later in the bar we were allowed to check in, upon check in they had booked both of us for a massage when it should have only been myself, we get to our room to find its a double bed when should have been a twin, we also got a 7am wake up call we didn't ask for but was told there was a problem with the phones (oh well thats ok then! if i wanted waking at 7am i'd have stayed at home with my daughter!!)

we get to spa to discuss mess up with booking, which my friend eventually canceled, only for her to walk round the corner to then hear the rude receptionists slagging her off for cancelling a massage that she didnt' even book!!

After what was a nice massage at the time, the following day after going home i was in a lot of pain, a trip to a&e confirms i have a fractured rib due to the massage!!!

Its been 3 weeks since my trip there and i've had 1 email back from the House Manager in relation to my fracture an that was to ask what name the room was booked in!!

Poor Poor service all round really.. staff were more interested in chatting, receptionist was caked in make up and generally rude either on the phone or in person, food was so overpriced that we went to the pub over the road for dinner..towels were well used and the overall mood of the place was glum.

For my first ever Spa & massage experience its actually put me off doing something like this again and i certainly wouldn't waste my money going to Greenwoods again.

Our 24 hour stay was pleasant but the Hotel didn't live up to its 4 star rating.

Our room was comfortable and cosely decorated but there were only electric plugs on the floor ? Hence the tea making kettle occupied the floor space by the bathroom.

Champayne wires were on the bathroom floor sadly missing was a full botle.

The view from the window of yellow laundry bags lying on the lawn was again an example of poor attention to detail. Walking the grounds discarded bottles were evidence that the wedding venue hadn't been total

ly cleared up.

The carpets and the paint work in the corridors did cry out for some T.L.C. also the ever present room trolleys and piles of new and used bed linen on our corridor were not what a four star hotel should practice.

The used cups and discarded items strewn under the sun beds by th

e excellent swimming pool again showed a lack of staff attention.

The very comfortable lounge had not been cleared of dirty afternoon tea

crockery when we took a pre dinner drink at 7:00pm. The food and service in the restaurant was excellent but when we were served our post dinner tea and coffee in the bar the milk was rancid and congealed into a solid ball when the coffee was added to the cup. The cups and the milk was replaced an the item deleared from our bill whe I raised the matter

on checking out.

Me and my husband have recently spent a very much needed weekend away at Greenwoods Hotel and Spa.On arrival we were greeted by smiley receptionist and showed around by young concierge.Our room was spacious with a beautiful garden view. We had premier room with Jacuzzi bath and great antic bed - a special treat to us from my mum.As part of our package we had 3 course dinner in Rosewood restaurant which was really delicious and cooked to perfection.I have even left a little thank you note for the Chef! To top our lovely weekend together my husband also treated us to full body massages and facials which were soooo relaxing.My therapist was very professional and made sure my massage was a bit firmer - just as I like it!We have enjoyed every minute of our Greenwoods experience and are already thinking of coming back soon.Great hotel and friendly staff!I will recommend it to everyone!

I am writing this in tears after being really let down by Greenwoods Spa. Called to book a nice day for my hen party and was quoted a package price for the classic and told that my party could phone and book treatments and pay for those directly. Just called back to book after letting my hens know the prices and was asked for double the quoted price. When I said the figure I was quoted, I was told that there must have been a 'misunderstanding' and that they weren't blaming anyone. Then she told me about four times that the only other person in the office had been there five years and was well aware of their pricing. Err, so you're blaming me then, yeah? Just made the figures up did i?! I was told that as they were a business and I was just calling up saying I was quoted a price ("which anyone can do, dontcha know") then they weren't obliged to honour anything and I "either book it or I don't". Well in that case, I don't.

Anyway so whilst I'm sure it's a lovely place once you actually get there, if you actually get there, but their customer service is enough to prevent that happening. I'm sure my friends and family could have afforded the hike, even at double the original quote, but after you're made to feel like a lying, unworthy idiot, you don't really fancy paying the bottom end, let alone the top.

Apologies that this is less of a review about facilities rather than service but in my opinion the two are equally important and with such appalling service around the most important time of my life, I'm not in a rush to recommend them!!

Brilliant stay with excellent service that made your custom feel appreciated. I came with my girlfriend and another couple, for a wedding at another venue. Had dinner in the restaurant, which was included in the room rate. Really nice grounds and staff with Art-Deco/Edwardian rooms. Would definitely return and recommend, however we were surprised to find no cocktail menu and the bar menu was a bit limited. We would have liked to know in advance to book Spa sessions before we arrived.